You’ll Get There When You Get There

I don’t want you just to make love to, or to talk to, or to confide in, or to massage, or to just look into your eyes, or to have our souls consumed in this fire of love.  It’s not because of any one of those things.  It’s because of all of them!  It’s because when I wake my first thought is of you, when I sleep my last thought is of you, when I dream, my dreams are only of you.  And when I whisper, it’s your name that passes my lips.

Such beautiful, poetic words written by my husband of almost 15 years.  Too bad the email I was reading wasn’t to me.

Hello, my name is Summer Smith, and my husband cheated on me.  This blog is my attempt at stumbling through completely new territory – the end to my happily ever after.  I’m going to share a lot — maybe too much — but the more people I talk to, the more I hear that I’m not alone in my struggle.

If you found this blog, you probably know exactly what I’m talking about.  We might tell ourselves, “No way I would ever stay with a cheater.  Cheating is a deal breaker — I’d kick his sorry butt to the curb.”  But when the reality of this ultimate betrayal actually smacks you in the face, decisions are so much harder to make than you ever thought they would be — especially if kids are involved.  What I am going to share is my path — my journey — to dealing with my now ex-husband’s infidelity.  By reading it, I hope you realize that you are not alone, and you aren’t crazy for feeling whatever you are feeling.  The healing process takes a loooooooooooooong time.  It’s been more than five years for me AND I’m divorced, but it still stings.  Please don’t ever let anyone tell you that you aren’t healing fast enough.  You’ll get there when you get there.